Friday, October 11, 2013

Day 76 of 365

Sometimes you need to tear it down…

…so you can build it back up again.

I started this journey with a simple goal – write My Journey with Lea, and have it published within a year. For those of you that have followed the blog so far (thank you!) you have probably seen me go through a bit of a journey myself in the past 76 days. Highs, lows, and lots of in-betweens.

This past year has brought to me more life changes than I could have possibly imagined. I knew it would be a year of change and adjustment, as I was starting a new career and a loved one was about to embark on a milestone journey of his own. But to look back and consider the layers of change that were piled on in addition to all that was expected, wow. Overwhelming when I stop to think about it.
But here I am, feeling stronger than ever. Starting over. 

The old foundation that I thought was rock solid beneath my feet is now gone. I am building a new one. 
The dreams I once had for the future have disappeared. I am creating new ones. 
The thoughts that once made me smile now make me sigh. I am thinking new thoughts.

Last year was the year of change. This year will be the year to rebuild. I have gutted the house. I am ready to put in new floors, new walls, a new ceiling. When all is said and done the house will be show read and better than ever.

I am doing the same with My Journey with Lea. The chapter by chapter approach was not working for me. I have decided to stitch the book back together, go to the beginning, and just write the story from start to finish. Holding on to all that was written, but taking a fresh approach to the project.

So for you, the reader, here’s part of the opening chapter. For Alex it marks the beginning of a very long journey.

After two quick, panicked filled gasps Alex shook herself awake, sitting straight up. Her heart was beating a mile a minute and she was sweating heavily under the weight of her cotton sheet and the textured, homemade quilt. She quickly discarded both and fell backwards into the pillows. “I’m here. I’m here.” She placed both hands on her chest, trying to control her breathing, finding comfort in the solidity of the flesh and bone beneath her fingers. 

Her mind drifted to the dream that had shaken the crap out of her world. “God, it felt so real.” She thought. “I was gone. I felt myself die. Surreal.” She shook her head, trying to clear the cobwebs and the anxiety that was building again. “But who the hell was that man?” Alex took a long, deep breath and exhaled slowly. “I have to stop reading Steven King at night. It’s screwing with my sleep.”

She glanced at her clock – 5:15 am. Alex groaned. “Game tonight. Way too flipping early to wake up on a vacation day.” Her sweaty, coverless body was now cold, so she retrieved the discarded quilt and bundled up again, tucking her knees into her chest and rolling herself into a protective ball. “It’s going to be a long night.” As she started to drift off again the man returned to her thoughts, his brown eyes looking up to see her leave the room.

Alex had no way of knowing it, but her long journey had just begun. There would be many adjustments along the way, but the good news for Alex is that she would always…

Believe in forever.


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